Wrestling Mania

So I'm not sure if anybody noticed that in my entry No Such Thing As Superman I used three wrestlers as examples. Since the World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) pay-per-view WrestleMania was this Sunday, the first of April, I thought that now might be a good time to talk about it a bit.

First let me get the fangirling out of the way and say that The Undertaker won his Hell In A Cell match against The Game (AKA: HHH, Triple H) which makes his WrestleMania streak 20-0. One of the best matches by far. Absolutely grueling.

Also CM Punk won his match against the Chris Jericho which means that the straight edge Chicagoan still holds the WWE championship. 

The other matches were good, but really these plots take ages to play out. It's kinda ridiculous leading up to the pay-per-view events, and even more ridiculous during the fallout after. The 'TakerxH match was really tailored to be the event of the evening. 

Sorry, this picture is a year old now.

Another moment that I appreciated, which was actually quite sweet, was the induction of Edge into the WWE hall of fame.

While most wrestlers aren't given that chance until they are much older, Edge was forced to stop wrestling due to a very serious injury. He had actually broken his neck, but still managed to wrestle for several more years before the doctors finally told him that if he continued, he would either suffer neck down paralysis or die.

The Diva's Championship match was shameful. Beth Phoenix, one of the few Divas who actually wrestled before coming to the WWE was "beaten" in a tag-team match by special guest Extra journalist, Maria Menounos.

Beth Phoenix

Maria M.

          Vs.

Really? You think that is at all likely?

Okay, where was I, again? Wrestling.

A lot of people snort derisively at the mention of WWE, TNA (Total Nonstop Action Wrestling), ROH (Ring Of Honor), and that sort of wrestling. "It's not even real." They say. That is my first clue that these people are checked out. Okay so most of the fights are scripted, or at least the winner is always decided ahead of time. The stunts, however, are real. They do hurt. One small "botch" (mistake/mess-up) can end a wrestlers career or worse. Owen Hart actually died from a botched stunt in front of a live audience. The home viewers were watching a promo that was on the Titantron at the moment and only saw the aftermath. Edge and "Stone Cold" Steve Austin had to end their careers early due to injuries gained from botched moves. What I am saying is that these people put their bodies on the line to entertain people because it is something that they are extremely passionate about. So please, don't scorn them. You couldn't do a quarter of what they put themselves through on a regular basis.

As to the drug problem, the WWE, though not so much TNA, has be seriously cracking down on their wrestlers. Drug tests are conducted regularly, and they have a very strict three-strike policy which is null if the wrestler in question refuses rehab. In that case the wrestler is out. No good-bye to the fans, no finishing a story-line or just one more match. OUT.

Chyna before

My pet peeve- female "wrestling" in the WWE:

Chyna after

The Divas. Oh the Divas. Where to even start? At some point the WWE decided that all of it's female wrestlers were going to be called "Divas" and that they all had to have super bosoms. This was probably not the smartest thought, especially when they, after much hemming and hawing, got one of the few remaining female wrestlers at the time to get breast implants. It may not come as a surprise, but putting an implant in a very muscular woman who engages in a high-impact sport was maybe not the best of ideas. Sure enough, during a match one of poor Chyna's implants broke. Lesson learned? Not quite. She was not the last to have a boob job rupture in the ring. The good news is that this forced the creation of a sturdier implant in the hope of minimizing repeats.

Kharma

 It's not that I don't think that these women work hard to do their jobs. I just notice that they are chosen and trained for the purpose of being eye-candy, not fighters. I feel like it's their job not to be taken as seriously or given as much credit. Chyna was the first woman to participate in a Royal Rumble match. Not only that, but she did so two years in a row. While these were truly momentous occasions, she was only permitted to stay in the ring for neigh 35-37 seconds each time. Ten years later Beth Phoenix was allowed in and she still holds the female record at one minute and thirty-seven seconds in the Royal Rumble. Last year's tolken female, Kharma stayed in for one minute flat. On a positive note, none of the women made the "shortest time spent in the Royal Rumble" list...