I am getting really tired of human relationships. Everybody needs something from somebody. There's always the opportunity for equality, but it is killed almost instantly due to lack of trust. I'm tired of people taking their abandonment issues out on me. I don't forget my friends. I don't leave my friends. My way of showing friendship is by being honest and by listening with an open heart and mind. I'm tired of being the bad guy for not agreeing with the people who have holier-than-thou attitudes. I'm tired of being the bad guy, even when I'm not. I am NOT a punching bag. There is NOT a sign on my head that says, "She's a bitch, so kick her when you can."
There was a point in my life when I cut myself off from the idea of "humanity" because it was flawed and despicable. It took one day amongst the 90 Day Delinquents Shadowcast troupe to crack the ice that I had encased myself in. Eventually I wondered why I would have even wanted to hide myself away.
In the past month, I have started to more and more regret the breaking of this shell. It has been too long without a taste of my type of crazy in a free environment. The longer I go, the less sure of my footing I feel.
What do you do, when your best friend in the world, is shaking their finger at you?
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